"I'm not going to put busty..."

"What are three adjectives that describe me?" I asked my coworkers as I browsed down OkCupid's extensive list of profile questions.

"Mm how about vivacious?" replied Kennedy.

"I still need two more," I whined. Describing yourself in three adjectives was an unpleasant task. I mean, ideally I would have said brilliant or something, but then you just come off as pretentious.

"Busty!" called Jen from the corner. The worst part was, she was being serious. I quickly scrolled down to "What is the first thing people notice about you?" and typed in "My boobs."

And that was how I got started on my first ever dating site. Kind of.

It actually all started when my roommate and her boyfriend broke up. We were trying to find her a rebound (yeah, good friends, I know) and decided to sign her on to an online dating site. The first one wasn't OkCupid, it was eHarmony.

For anyone other than nice conservative Christian boys and girls, eHarmony is an epic FAIL. For one, it only offers the choice of male seeking female or female seeking male. That is a big WTF?! I mean, come on, it's freakin' 2009. Gay people can even GET MARRIED in most places. Geeze eHarmony.

It didn't get better. The match questions just made you feel like a bad person either only letting you choose between extremes or picking on tiny things that EVERYONE must do like "Have you ever had a bad thought" or "Have you ever took a fleeting glance at someone other than your lifemate?" I might be exxagerating a little here, but it was bad.

Definately not the place for my slightly kinky roommate with Wiccan tendencies. Moving on.

We went to OkCupid next and had a much nicer experience. There was room for a little bit of fun, a little bit of sin. I signed up too, just because taking the tests looked like fun. She messaged a few guys and I went away on a conference and forgot I ever signed up.

Then a day or so after I got home I was checking my junkmail, and I already had messages from OkCupid users! Got to admit it was a little bit of an ego boost. So, out of curiousity (I swear, it was all out of curiousity) I logged back in to check these guys out.

Intrigued by who these people were and why they are using online dating sites (which I always thought were for desperate losers) I made myself a profile (The site told me I'd get more responses that way). I added pictures because in OkCupid you don't show up on search without them, and I answered several questions about myself instead of writing articles for the school paper where I work.

The first message I got was from a 28 year old local guy. A little old for me but okay. I can't show you his exact message because it would reveal my username (and I don't want all ya'll hunting me down on OkCupid) but he basically asked me to tell him about me. So I reply (I've actually replied to everyone so far because I feel bad not...) Tell him maybe, three things.

Here's his reply:

I just turned 28. I am in my last semester of my second degree in Art History (first was in Social Science) at UVic and am gunning for Law School. I have a dog (but like cats) and read and write voraciously in almost every genre and medium. My favorites are Graphic Novels and Gonzo Journalism though I dabble in may others. I have a personal library that spans three book cases.

See what's wrong with this picture? Not one question. So I haven't said anything back. However, I do know he looked at my profile today at noon, because OkCupid gives you the option of browsing openly. A lot of random people from the states have been viewing my profile too.

Even a guy from Germany wrote to me. He actually wrote to me several times, full of flattery and praise. GAG reflex. There seems to be something about online conversations that removes people's social inhibitions. It stil makes me uncomfortable but at least I know I'll never have to actually meet him in person. Although he did offer to fly to Canada and bring me tea...

I guess for shy people this is a good option. It's less personal, and you still get to incorporate that element of shallowness that we all have. For now I'm doing okay with it. Talking to people on the internet doesn't seem all that real. It's actually deciding to meet up with someone that's the scary part. That can come later, for now I'm just going to take it slooow.